Airplanes, Face-time and Crocodile Tears: When Traveling is a Must

I don’t do much traveling for my job. Once or twice a year, I have a short business trip that lasts four to five days each, which isn’t too bad. It’s not that I don’t enjoy travel. I love it. It’s just that I can’t stand the crocodile tears that come with it when I have to leave. Saying goodbye is never easy, but it is especially hard when it’s to small children. They don’t have the same time sense that we do, and so to them, four days  feels like an eternity.

I haven’t been away since February. My son didn’t like that trip much either, yet, it was only an hour away, and so though it lasted for three days, he was okay with it.  However, when I got the news that one of my best friends from college was diagnosed with stage 4 ovarian cancer, I knew I would be making the trip. This was not an hour away. I live on the East Cost of the United States, and she is in British Columbia, Canada. It’s a bit of a haul with a three hour time difference…emotions running high.

I hadn’t been back in 18 years. That’s a long time. There are many memories, good and bad, attached to my college experience, and I had closed the door on it all. I never planned on going back. But this news called for a change of plans, and rapidly.

“You have to go,” my husband said as he walked in after work to find me sitting on my bed staring at my phone, where we had just received the news.

“I know,” I said, “it’s high time anyway.” We scoured Cheap Flights for a reasonable ticket, and clicked “purchase”.

My husband and I broke the news to Alex, and he held it together pretty well until the end. “It’ll go fast,” I tried to reassure him.

“I know,” he quipped, with a bit of an attitude. “I just hate it when you leave!” He exploded as his emotions leaked out through his. Crocodile tears. Oh no. Those things pull on my heart strings. I hugged him and we snuggled and then changed the subject. We had five weeks until departure, so better focus on something else.

Five weeks seemed to take an eternity. The trip loomed over me, not because I was dreading it, but because I felt like I couldn’t get there fast enough. My friend was struggling. Her lungs were filling with fluid. The cancer had spread to other locations. She is an Irish rose that immigrated to Canada in 1996. We arrived at school around the same time, and became good friends. By my third year, we were inseparable, sharing tea, chocolate, and heartbreaks.

The last day I saw her, she was leaving on her honeymoon in her beautiful white dress. I waved and smiled until they were out of sight, and then broke down and cried. I wondered when I would see her again. I never could have imagined it would be 18 years later.

Slowly the days rolled by and I prepared for my trip by freaking out about all of the weight I have gained since I graduated, trying on clothes, eating Ben and Jerry’s ice cream, and then ultimately deciding it was what it was, and I would have to deal. After all, this trip wasn’t about me. I gave the trip to Jesus, and asked Him to be in charge.

He was.

It was insane how the pieces came together. The details that I never could have planned myself just fell into place. I ended up being on the same flight from Calgary to Fort Saint John as a friend of mine who was traveling from a completely different location.  We had friends offer us a place to stay. We had someone let us borrow their truck. Though the trip was an emotional one, it felt like God gift wrapped it in love and placed it in my hands.

I dropped Alex off at school on a Friday morning and said goodbye. Thankfully, he was distracted so our goodbye tears were minimal. I raced to Montreal to catch my 12:30 flight, which I almost missed due to traffic and construction along the way. I flopped into my chair on the plane, and breathed a sigh of relief.

As I gazed out the window halfway through the trip, I took in the majesty of Northern Canada’s beauty. I had forgotten what it looked like and how much I had loved  it. I took it all in, meanwhile checking my phone for messages from my husband to see how Alex was doing.

I knew 8:00 would be his biggest struggle. I am a schedule girl. It is ingrained in me, and with the time difference I paid close attention, as I knew precisely when he would be having the hardest time. Bedtime was always a challenge when I wasn’t there. Before leaving, I had done everything I possibly could to make it easier for my husband who was now single parenting. The outfits were set out on the spare bed in order of when he would wear them, with a note under each one to help get him through his day.

As I navigated my way through the whirlwind trip, and the many blessings and emotions it involved, I stayed on east coast time, and face-timed every night around 7:45. Just before bed. We made it through without too many tears, although, once I got a message telling me that he was having quite a hard time, this called for an extra video chat.

God met me on this trip and offered me everything I needed. Even closure on some situations I was not even aware I needed closure for. I walked my old college stomping grounds, and allowed God to reach down deep and heal my heart. I talked with old friends, and laughed about married life and motherhood.

Six days whizzed by, and I found myself back on a plane, sad to say goodbye, but happy to be going home to see my peeps. I had received an audio  message the night before from a very excited seven year old telling me how happy he was that I was coming home.

Sixteen hours later, I walked through my door, and a warm, little body wrapped itself around me and held me. Only one word was spoken at first, “Mama!” After that, no words were needed. I was home. And all was right with the world again.

I have taken many trips in my life, business trips for work, as a college student that went to another country on the other side of the continent, a missionary in Colombia, joining my husband as he immigrated to the United States, and others. God sends us all over the world to serve His people sometimes. We are always saying goodbye. We are always missing someone.

Home is anywhere I am returning to. It’s not the place so much as the people.

Maybe you have to travel a lot for work or maybe there’s a girls trip on the horizon, here are some things you can do it make it easier for you family:

• Pray that the children are able to cope well.
• Prepare meals to freeze.
• Lay clothes out.
• Place a calendar on the fridge with any appointments, major projects due or extracurricular activities.
• Touch base with teachers if necessary.
• Schedule a video chat time each day.
• Leave sticky notes (say fun things or sentimental things).
• Bring back souvenirs.

How do you prepare before heading out of town? Share your must-do’s and travel check list.