Anxiety. It comes in many forms, strikes without warning, and whispers many lies.
For some, it is that tight chest feeling that makes you squeeze your shoulder blades together to try and get some relief. For others, it is feeling nauseous, or like you want to cry uncontrollably. It’s that overwhelming feeling that everything is coming apart – or inevitably will – and you are the only one who can keep it together.
Anxiety can stem from believing that we have to do it all. As soon as we realize we can’t do it all, and we truly accept this fact, we can start breathing again.
I cleaned my house the other day. REALLY cleaned it. I dusted everything and steamed the floors kind-of-cleaned. I reached and got cobwebs hanging down from the most awkward of places. Then, we lived our lives in the house and in what felt like an instant, the house was a disaster. We got ready for one wedding, attended one Sunday service, and BOOM! disaster.
So, I cleaned it again. As I did, I began thinking about all of the other duties mounting up on me as I was going through the same motions I have 100 times before. My chest began to tighten. I began to feel overwhelmed. I wanted to cry.
On top of that, I am in the middle of organizing a huge fundraising event for work. I can’t help but bring this home with me, and with it comes the stress catalyst that leads to anxiety. For me, I remember to breathe. You know that Jordan Feliz song, “Just Breathe”? Well, that’s what I did.
Here’s a confession: sometimes I write myself notes and put them all around my house and office reminding myself to breathe. It seems sad that we sometimes need reminders to breathe, but little steps can lead to bigger changes.
Anxiety can stem from believing that we have to do it all. As soon as we realize we can’t do it all, and we truly accept this fact, we can start breathing again. The post-it note reminders will give way to habit. Remembering to breathe calmly will become a habit.
As I took long, deep breaths, I remembered that I can do anything but I can’t do everything. I calmed down, slowed down, and sat down. Then, I put my feet up and drank some water. This feeling was not going to steal any more time away from a happy life.
As the cool water went down and hydrated my parched soul, my mind wandered back to the night before when my son and I had spent some time together. I felt relaxed, and we played and visited. He noticed. He commented on how much he enjoyed our time together. It was easy and fun, and there was no anxiety.
I made a strong effort not to focus on all of the things I had piling up on me at the office as my week began. Instead, I focused on breathing and staying relaxed. I give myself a 6 out of 10. The anxiety had already found me before I realized what had happened.
Today, I’m ahead of the game. It is our weekly pajama party night when my husband works late and my son and I get in jammies, eat breakfast for supper, and watch a movie together in the living room. I want a repeat of the other night. While I know that it’s not always possible because I can’t control moods, or every aspect of my day, I can do what I can to help guard against needless anxiety.
Here are some things I do when I need help kicking anxiety to the curb:
Let Some Things Go
Sometimes, the cobwebs can stay in the corner. When a deadline at work can’t be missed, the oven can stay dirty. I know we are Wonder Women, but I’m betting she had a dirty kitchen too. And we don’t think less of her, do we?
Exercise
Getting mobile can seriously help fight against anxiety. Adrenaline is stored in your body for hours and needs help to flush it out from where it doesn’t belong. This can even be a family time event. Take a walk, swim, do jumping jacks. The possibilities are endless.
Deep Breathing
Anxiety is caused by adrenaline rushes which can be triggered by not breathing properly. Taking 10 minutes a day to do mindful, deep breathing exercises can make a huge difference.
Time with Jesus
Time alone with the one who gives us peace and bares our burdens is one of the best things we can do to help fight against anxiety. He is always there for us, and He not only cares, He understands. Jesus gets it; He wants us to come sit quietly with Him and take a load off.
See a Doctor
Sometimes anxiety can become too difficult to combat with natural methods, and it is time to see a doctor. This does not mean you are weak, it means you have been too strong for too long. The stigma behind mental health is one that needs to be broken and if you feel you can no longer control your anxiety on your own, do not be afraid to pick up the phone and schedule an appointment. After all, you put your oxygen mask on first so you are well enough to put them on your children. Mental health is no different.
So tonight as I snuggle with my little guy and we watch some boy-zone Netflix, I am going to remember to let the little things go, do the dishes when I can, and keep my arm around that warm little body tucked in close to mine. And breathe…..
I wish the same for you.
